With the changing world, the definition of relationship has changed largely. What once used to be a simple romantic arrangement between two people, can now be anything from a date, a fling, a one-night stand, an open relationship, a committed relationship, a casual relationship, to a ‘situationship’. So relationship vs situationship: what is the difference? If you’ve never been in a situationship, then it might be a little tricky for you to understand it. It is a romantic relationship that is and continues to be undefined; just one of those platonic, poetic relationships that cannot be labelled yet cannot even be denied. It is a sweet spot between a friendship and a romantic relationship where both have feelings for each other but are not sure enough to commit.
Paradoxical as it may sound, it is all fun and games as long as both of them have clarity about this confusion. The real problem begins when one person assumes that it is a committed relationship, while the other still is hanging in between. So how would you know if you are in fact in a relationship or a situationship? Take a look at some of the basic characteristics of a situationship and make a mental checklist to see if they apply to your scenario. Let’s begin with relationship vs situationship.
- Superficial conversations mostly centered around sex
Your conversations are surface level, mostly centering around sex. There aren’t any wholesome discussions, and every topic seems to have sparked from a sexually heightened state of mind. While it may seem all hot and kinky to discuss sexual intimacy, you might want to pause and think if there’s anything beyond the physical connection. In Situationship however, guys do chat privately with an Asian girlfriend as there is no commitment yet.
- No attempt to make plans
There is no attempt to plan any outing or date. Most plans are based on a general idea of hanging out or to have sex. Lack of efforts to create any special moments may be a sign that you are in a situationship instead of a relationship.
- There’s no ‘we’
A major difference between relationship and situationship is future planning. When discussing the future, it is always ‘I’ or ‘you’ and never ‘we’. If they seem to cut you out of the picture while talking about their future plans, then they have pretty much decided you aren’t going to be in it.
- Lack of consistency
Here’s another way to understand what is situationship. One day they are all over you, constantly texting and calling, and showering you with attention, only to disappear the next day. Lack of consistency usually means that it is a convenience-based relation, and they pull you close only when it is suitable to them.
- You aren’t a part of their social circle
If they haven’t introduced you to their friends, its most probably because they don’t know how to. As we said, a situationship is basically an undefined relationship, making it tough to explain to others. They are most likely avoiding the dilemma of introducing you either as their friend or partner, and consequently you aren’t a part of their social circle yet.
- Mixed signals
Are you unsure of their feelings? Do they give you reasons to be unsure? Being emotionally and/or physically intimate one day only to act distant the next, is a sign that they aren’t sure of it themselves. Giving mixed signals can be very confusing and leave you wondering about your place in their life.
On the other hand,
A romantic relationship is clear, without confusion and has a name. You are either their partner or their fiancé. You are a solid part of their life and possibly their future. If they take efforts to spend time with you, make you feel special, care about your needs, both physically and emotionally, do the little things that matter and do not leave space for any confusion, then you can be sure that is quite definitely a relationship.
Situationships can turn into relationships sometimes, if the person has a change of heart or can finally make up their mind. Till then, however, it is better to understand the signs and not let yourself have false illusions about the whole picture.
